Friday, 11 June 2010

Trying to resolve things

I spent yesterday and this morning really thinking about the kindy thing - mainly the boy punching the girl during my English lesson. I didn't end up talking to the teacher about it as I got blindsided by another mother and we had a bit of a gass and I forgot. In hindsight I think it was for the best though. Obviously I wasn't going to leave it at me doing nothing though.

On our walk to kindy this morning we passed the girl's house. It is over a paddy but we yelled out good morning and I yelled out after her face. She yelled back that it was fine and off we went. From across the paddy though it looked to me like her mother was hearing this information for the first time so I was still festering about it.

Ryu and I had a nap this morning - it was great. The kind where you wake up with drool on the pillow wondering where the fuck in China you are and why it's light outside. Deep sleep. Was muchly needed.
We then went on the first shop for Sunday's festivities. I have to do one shop two days before so that I still have a day to get all the shit I will no doubt forget. And I have - hmmmm, no butter for the 'butter icing', no juice and no ham and no salsa. Tomorrow will be busy as have to clean the house and the garden too. Hub will be here though and by god he will be helping, regardless of severity of self induced hangover after tonight's night out with the office.

Anyway, on the way back from shopping I make up my mind to go to the girls house again. I have gone over what I want to say. This kind of thing is hard anywhere but Japan doesn't make it easy to be the 'tell-taler'. I had decided to go the 'it happened during my class and that's why I'm here' route.

It was lunch time so I caught the girl's mum at home. I asked about her daughters face and she said it was fine, there was no bruising but that my yelling out this morning was the first she heard of the incident. I told her exactly what happened and apologized for not doing anything other than a very feeble reprimand of the boy in question. We talked about how the teachers shouldn't be letting this shit slide and how it is sending very bad messages to not just the boy who punched her but to the whole class.

The mother is going to talk to the teacher in charge when she goes to pick her daughter up this afternoon.

It really is hard you know. Knowing what the right thing to do is. This is a small community. I have known most of the teachers since I was working as a CIR on JET. I know a lot of the kids and the parents and if I don't then hopefully I will be teaching their children at some stage over the years.  I don't want to be the confrontational gaijin who rocks the boat but then again I can't let this happen without doing anything, especially as I have witnessed it with my own eyes.

I still plan on talking to the teacher before my next class. I also have the email of the mother of the boy so am umming and ahhing over whether to send her a very delicately worded email as well. I know I should. Then, after both the parents know.... well they can fight their own fight with the kindy teacher. I can't be referee for other people's fights. It's too bloody draining.

And about the slapper bitey bitch - well, Marina came away clean yesterday. The teachers were very happy in reporting this to me. To put in a few good words for the kindy - cause it's not all biting and punching. My kids are 90 percent of the time very happy there. They come home happy, with stories to tell and songs to sing. They very rarely put up a fuss about actually going and if they do it is because Shou has been out in the garden before breakfast and caught some disgusting crawly thing and would like to stay at home all day to watch it and try and catch more.

They get very nutritious meals, a nap and a fairly structured schedule. I don't think Marina gets enough stimulation but it's the babies class so I don't imagine the teachers will introduce too much more. She will get more stimulation when she moves up a class in April.

Of course this doesn't compensate for the bodily harm and if Sakura continues to look like she isn't calming down on the biting thing then Marina will come out until the teachers sort their shit out. Moving both of them to the other kindy is an option but at the moment they are in the same classes as the kids they will be going to school with. There is always that option though and I don't think that the other place is full.

Anyway, best get my New Zealand bag together, complete with vegemite and honey and tasters, for my first class for the year at the primary school. I can do what I want but could this first lesson please be on New Zealand - honestly, the only people in the room that wouldn't have heard this sepal before are the two teachers. Ah well. I do plan on introducing knuckle bones, elastics and the Maori stick game though so they can spend half an hour in groups playing those - and then gagging and running out to the water fountain when they try the vegemite thinking that it is chocolate. Fun, fun, fun.

Oh, and I lost 600g this week. Not great but considering the stress levels this week it is nothing short of a miracle. Is all this walking and festering I tell you.

Oh, oh, the new man teacher was in the room when the punch incident occurred. He did nothing and I now no longer think he is even remotely hot. Fuckin wimp I say.


Later - Sakura and her mum and brother have just been over to apologize - with a box of donuts (there goes that 600g) and Sakura had a special box of Kitty-chan plasters for Marina!! The mother isn't who I was thinking and Sakura's mum is very lovely girl. I can't believe she produced such a slapper bitey child, although I think I might have seen Sakura smile this evening - that's a first. It hasn't rectified the situation but it is a step in the right direction, an important one I think. Not the donuts. The apology. Now the teachers just need to shape up or ship out.


Corinne said...

I meant to comment on those bite piccies, they really are nasty!!
I was thinking ash is pretty lucky at his kindy then we walked in this morning and a kid came flying at the llittlest girl in the class and she fell and smacked her head on a chair...
I'm listening to a lady gaga song with lyrics "show me your teeth" should be sakura's theme song as she walks into kindy.

Really hope it gets resolved soon, good on you for taking action!

Rachel said...

I had great fun doing elastics with the primary school kids, I always neglect to tell them it's a girls game and the boys really get into it too! Apparently at my last school they were doing at recess too!

Nice to hear about Sakura. Sounds like a biting phase, not a sociopath-in-training after all.

Shall I bring food on Sunday? I'm thinking of lamingtons and a potato and sausage dish.

Brenda said...

Really glad to hear that things have started to work themselves out. I know I shouldn't laugh but I think it's hilarious that Sakura brought Marina a box of plasters. If ever there was an appropriate gift

Gaijin Wife said...

Corinne - can just imagine Sakura stomping into kinder with her own theme song. Excellent.

Rachel - I am definitely not going to turn down laminations and a spud and sausage dish. That would be foolishness. Everyone is coming around half ten. You can come when you want and stay as long as you like. The elastics was a great hit with the boys. Knucklebones was the overall winner.

Brenda - I thought the plasters was a very bold move. Marina of course loves them and went to bed with about ten stuck to various non injured parts of her body and woke up this morning with most of them having moved to her PJs or her hair!

Gaijin Wife said...

fuck it - sorry rachel. Obviously I meant lamingtons and not laminations. This spell check is auto bloody mattic. I need to change the setting. kindy keeps coming up as kidney and I have to re-type it. see you tomorrow.

Sarah said...

So glad to hear that the other parents appear to be decent people. Good luck with getting the kindy teachers to do something. Poor Marina, those bites are scarey and something needs to be done! That said, I think what would worry me more is the lesson that not-punishing these types of things sends to the kids. That they can beat up on each other without repercussions... yikes!

Lulu said...

It sounds as if Sakura`s mum is not so bad?! I guess it is a biting phase instead of issues at home maybe? Hopefully she grows out of it quick smart. Does she bite people at home? If so her mum should just bite her back.

My mum bit me when I was little and apparently I never bit anyone again. Sakura might not know how much it actually HURTS!

Hello Kitty band aids though...haha. Kind of funny (in an offbeat way!)