Friday, 18 June 2010

Skankyness and Fish 'n Chips

So I got a reply back from the Kiwi mummy blogs and I am going to get a quick link on their sidebar but not being added to their blog roll. I have just checked and the link isn't up there yet. I debated about whether or not to write this post but for the sake of all you lot, who live vicariously through gaijinwife, I decided just to post what I was going to and never mind that link on the mummy blogs that will no doubt be taken off due to my offensive references to porn.

I don't plan on making porn a common reference but I felt that I needed to share this episode as I was so shocked with self.

So last night the bubbles that hub bought home for my birthday were pink bubbles - rose of some kind. Not my bubble of choice but not one to look a gift horse in the mouth I quite willingly partook in helping to empty the bottle. He also brought two beers so again, quite willingly, I knock one of those back.

Now, usually half a bottle of bubbles and one beer is not enough to phase me. It's definitely not in the ballpark of making me act all silly, ride the stallion, and wake up with a sore head. There just MUST have been something in the combination of rose bubbles and asahi. Well that's my excuse.

So anyway, hub heads up to bed and I am here finishing my beer and surfing the net. As you do when you have a lovely computer that actually opens pages for you in less than 24 hours.  I do not recall how I came across the site - I was obviously doing a bit of looking but not sure how I linked to it or if I google searched.

I somehow end up watching short porn flick of two supposed housewives getting it on with an electrician or similar. Now I'm not a huge porn person. Neither is hub. He'll quite happily flick through the bra and panty section of the Victoria Secret catalogue and we even watched a vid at home once but other than that.

Well, having fueled the fantasy bank I head upstairs and 'ride hub like a stallion' - to use my own wording there. It was by far the most raunchiest international relations meeting of recent times. Hub was quite overcome. I can tell you that if he thinks he's getting that every night there will be NO pachinko visiting. Might be an effective course of action.

This morning I wake up, sore head and all, at FOUR THIRTY thanks to Marina and Shou. It takes a good hour to remember the goings on of last night but when I do I get this feeling of dread.

After the kids are safely at kindy and Ryu is asleep I check my online banking and whadda ya know - I now have a years membership to 'Horny Housewives'! Fuck me sideways. Or hub. Or the electrician. Shit, but not our one cause he is a complete retard.

Feeling like a skanky slutty slapper I go to the site to try and cancel my membership. Find out there is a three day trial for x amount of dollars and if I don't cancel within that time it is then 39.95 US$ a month.  Cancel membership.  Got it for two more days though....

Neeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiggggghhhhh

That was hub by the way - trying to neigh (??) like a stallion.

So other than feeling like a skanky hoe today...

Ryu and I took it very easy. Very quiet morning. I spoke to my sister for a while and then my brother.

Face value this is what my family is at present...

Father - retired doctor with anger management issues and affiliation to pot (the substance not the thing you cook stuff in)
Mother - can't mention her cause she has brain tumor and that wasn't self inflicted.
Daughter 1 - financial crisis that revolves around owing parents xxx thousand dollars.
Daughter 2 - recovering alcoholic
Daughter 3 - married to Japanese man with a secret gambling problem (although not so secret as the stupid fucker keeps getting caught)
Son 1 - approaching 30 and living back at home with financial issues

Of course there is shitloads of stuff going on in each situation. My sister isn't talking to the other sister, who isn't really talking to my brother, who is maybe siding with my father, who is not talking to daughter number 1 and vice versa.

Wahoo. Trip home in October is going to be AWESOME.

I spoke to my dad too today. Mum, who had her last radio treatment today, was sleeping. Dad sounded shattered. I really feel for him. He is dealing with all this stuff with mum and then has all this other shit going on with his kids. Sigh. Hang in there dad. We'll all grow up soon enough.

Anyway, I will probably talk to my other sister tomorrow and hopefully mum if she's feeling up to it.

And tomorrow night - I'm out with Chiemi. Local place that used to be a really cool izakaya/restaurant before it turned into a cafe lounge (spelt launge). Haven't been since it revamped but apparently they do food too so we are going there for nama beer, a cocktail or two, and some fried chicken and the likes. Am well excited about this. The place is like 1km from our house and I am biking there but seriously... I get out of the house with no children so who cares where.

And finally some pics.... not very good ones but never mind...

Shou came home from kindy with this - a cookie for father's day on Sunday. This is hub. By the time hub actually got home his face was cracked in two and Shou had eaten one ear.

Finally got around to fish and chipping the shark that Heather sent down. Well the fish at least!! the chips are kumura (sweet potato) chips. THANKYOU Heather. Yum yum yum.

Yuuuuuuuuuum, this tissue looks tasty!!
OK, so perhaps that wasn't a very good idea.
Fuzzy  but you get the idea.

Right, I better hit the hay.  I just put in an email in for a translation job. 21 minutes after the email was sent to me and the job had been taken already. Bugger. Nevermind though. Should be some similar ones coming up soon.

Oh, and did you see my new widget on the right sidebar down the bottom. You choose an artist and can hear a couple of their songs for free!! Great. You have to keep the window open though.

Nighty night campers.

SDGH&QL

9 comments:

illahee said...

RAWR!!

but seriously, you killed me with the cookie. at least you got a picture of it first!! LOL

can i swap you tommy for ryu? tommy's a real sweetheart, just only kinda two. just for the day, mind. i couldn't give up my baby for longer than that!!

Hana said...

Hi there Katy,

Hana from Kiwiland here. I've been enjoying your blog.

I've only got one kid at the moment, a 5 year old boy, with another boy on the way. Not sure how you cope - but you're doing an amazing job with those three kids! They look very happy (and gorgeous!) in all the photos.

I mentioned your blog to my husband (also mad Japanese) who researched pachinko addiction a bit and suggested some website links for you. If you wanna see them, feel free to email me at hana craig at gmail dot com.

Cheerio,

Hana

Hana said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hana said...

Oh! And loved the porn story - been there, done that!

Rachel said...

ah, families are dramas, aren't they? We've had another drama added to our list, you might be interested to know. Maybe you will be the catalyst for a great big family hug when you go home.

I know you're going to have a GREAT time tomorrow night, it's lovely to get out and have a relaxing drink and a few bites to eat with a friend without having to chase a toddler across the restaurant!

I don't think you have to change your blog to fit someone's else's definition. It has to serve YOUR purpose in your life. (mine is a letter home/photo album). If it doesn't fit their definition, mke your own list.

(hoping you don't get addicted to horny housewife porn).

Lulu said...

Housewife porn! Muhahaha! Maybe I should give the link to my hub.


I am with Ilahee in that the cookie picture cracked me up- have only seen a couple pics of your hub but there is a bit of a resemblance, no? I can`t believe that Shou ate an ear!! hehe.

FaerySarah said...

please don't worry about KMB, post whatever you like about whoever (i know you will anyway) i would hate that you would change what you are doing here just because you have a link on our sidebar. We just ain't gutzy enough for such a 'real' blog!

we are working on it!....

L. said...

I had sort of a similar blog issue, back when I had ads on my blog -- I joined an ad circle for Japan-related blogs, which mine was, some of the time. But the problem was, I was living in San Francisco and writing mostly about my kids, and it really turned into more of a SF mommy blog than anything else.

And they dropped me.

Oh, well -- bad fit. Our blogs are what they are, and some links just aren't meant to be.

world of sekimachihato said...

bugger, here's guessing it's too late now to get your username + passport for that site you happened to sigh-up for...