Wednesday, 2 June 2010

A Much Better Day

Yesterday was a much better day (she says slurping a coffee that is so damn strong I swear it's going to turn me into a man). I thought I would have to come home after meeting at primary school and pass out for a nap to recover from hell night before.  Not so though, managed to survive the entire day and even be in quite a pleasant mummy mood in the evening.

The meeting at the primary school was a bit of a fuck off. I taught there once a month for a year. Then, come April of this year, ALL the key teachers (principal, vice and two English teachers) changed, obviously without leaving any form of bloody anything to let new lot know what had been going on.

I'm still going to be teaching there but the two new teachers I am dealing with don't want me to follow the primary school 'English Note' textbook that I used all of last year - as requested by the last lot. Which basically means the 6th years spent 12 lessons with me last year for jack shit. I don't mind not using the textbook, that's fine. But the teachers don't really even want me to use any of the words or vocab that they will be teaching the kids. Can I please just come and sing and play games? This year, instead of just the 5th and 6th years I have to have the 4th years too. Is still only 23 kids all together which is fine but what a 9 year old and what an 11 year old want to do is different. I can probably still get away with singing and being silly buggers with 9 year olds. 11 and 12 years old are starting to get all cool. Ah well, 12 lessons of bingo and fruit basket coming up then.

Also spoke to kindy yesterday. Am to be going there on the 2nd and 4th Thursday of each month. Half an hour with the pre-schoolers and half an hour with the 2 and 3 year olds (Marina and Shou together). I haven't taught my own offspring before so it will be interesting to see how they go. Not teaching so much as singing, dancing, silly buggers and lets try and give the gaijin a wedgie. Fun and games.

We are well and truly into Spring now. The weather has been fabulous. Ryu and I took advantage and went on the big walk loop again yesterday. I am planning on driving the car through the big tunnel and into the main bit of town (as in there is a bank and one traffic light)  and then doing our walk from there today. Legs still a bit sore from baby aerobics.

Speaking of which, I forgot to mention that we did about ten minutes of pelvic floor exercises at the baby aerobics on Monday. I was quite unprepared for it. As in, I got quite a shock when the instructor started talking about we women and our holes and how to close them up - her words not mine.

Instructor: "we women have three holes" (gesturing to 3 holes supposedly dangling mid-air in front of her face)
Gaijinwife: "Fuck. Haven't you guys got four? Or is that just a gaijin thing? Really missing out you are" (OK, so I just thought that)
Instructor: " when tightening the pelvic floor muscles you just need to squeeze your bumhole shut"
Gaijinwife: "nnnnnnngggggggggg" (squeezing bumhole shut )
Instructor: " and squeeze.... and release.... and squeeze.... and release..."
Instructor: " now everbody take a ball and sit on it"
Gaijinwife: "you sure?"
Instructor: " don't worry I've got a pump if the air goes down"
Gaijinwife: "awesome (silly slapper), can I just leave it attached to mine then please"
Instructor: "now roll to the right, hold, and squeeze your bumhole shut.... and release, back to the middle and roll to the left, hold, and squeeze..."
Gaijinwife: (lots of concentration involved in this exercise but am trying really hard as sick of slack pelvic floor that is hindering me from having a good laugh for fear of peeing pants)

Judging by the looks on the other mother's faces everyone was trying really hard - bar one woman who was feeding her baby and no doubt has a pelvic floor of steel anyway.

There is so much behind the scenes pregnancy, birth, baby and follow-up stuff we women have to deal with. Husbands out there - if your wife can sit and have a good laugh with you without leaking after pushing a baby, two, three or more out her saloon doors then congratulate her on her stellar efforts in restoring her pelvic floor to the pelvic floor of days gone by when she was foot loose and fancy free, not a care in world - definately not one about saloon doors and pelvic floor muscles anyway.

Right, I best get round to ticking a few more things off my list of chores for today - next on the list is take down the flying fish. One of those things that in reality will only take about fifteen minutes but which you keep putting off and putting off because it seems like such a pain in the arse.

Ooh, and a pic to sign off with...

Isn't she a rock star!



Nay said...

Finally I have a free moment (and free hand) to comment!!

Am so glad to hear that things have improved a lot since your mummy meltdown. Sometimes I seriously wonder if men have any common sense at all. I can just imagine Naoki doing something very similiar...

Good luck too on your weightloss!! I am cheering you on from here in Shizuoka. Can't join you because I don't met your requirements but I too am working hard on losing my jelly belly.

Have fun with the little kids - I find that it is seriously the easiest job ever! All you have to do is play with the kids in English and you get paid for it! Unbelievable... lol

Anonymous said...

A very good Wednesday afternoon to you. Help! I have always wondered what the Japanese word for "vain" is. Please save me from dying of curiosity.

I tried google translate and the English/Japanese dictionary. Is it really うぬぼれた? I may be wrong but I've always thought うぬぼれた is the Japanese word for being conceited.

Avid reader of Gaijin Wife

Adam W said...

Your husband was only trying to help! ;) Hahaha. Glad your days are getting better.

Your blog makes me want to settle down and have kids right now. Minus twat husband. I could do without one of those.

Gaijin Wife said...

Anon - vain... I have heard うぬぼれが強い before but have never used it myself. I would be more inclined to use 彼女が自分のことけっこう好きなんだね - she likes herself quite a lot aye - kind of thing. Hmmmm, good luck :) Sorry not much help.

Nay - Thankyou. I think the kindy thing will be fine. No pressure as is totally volunteer :)

Adam W - hi there. Hub the poor thing. He was only trying to help I know but sometimes I just wonder if he thinks at all!! Am presuming that part of blog that makes you want to settle down is pics of cute kids - as surely not the rants about sleepless nights and mummy meltdowns? :)

kuri, ping & the pinglet said...

Ohhh, Mummy-meltdowns. I can SO relate! I'm trying to cut down myself. :)

Pelvic floor muscles...what are those and where have they gone??

Glad that today was much better than yesterday! Hope we can do a GNO again with all the girls in Fukuoka sometime soon.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for helping. I appreciate it. I think "彼女が自分のことけっこう好きなんだね" is an infinitely better way of describing someone who is vain.

I agree wholeheartedly with everyone who has been singing praises about you and your blog. You're highly articulate and I just love your wry and wicked sense of humour.

I've not had the privilege of meeting you for a tete-a-tete but I think it would be really grand to be able to spend time with a scintillating conversationalist like you.

May all the accolodes you've been receiving from your avid blog readers culminate in a **book offer like Catherine Sanderson of the petite anglaise fame. She too like you is an expat mum albeit one living in Paris married to a Parisian.

Just don't go abandoning us blog readers when you receive your book deal (I was gutted when petite anglaise called it a day)

** A book deal would be lovely eh! You would be able to visit your mum and family on a whim.

katy said...

Anon - being able to go home without worrying about breaking the bank would be nice :) i'm not sure there's much of an audience for my rants but. You lot just have nothing better to do :) I appreciate the kind words but - of course.