Wednesday, 12 May 2010

Still here...

Holy Fuck - seems to be best expression for just making nearly 2,000 dollar purchase with credit card on peice of shit computer that will probably mean credit card used by some wanker in south america to buy a digital camera or breast implant for girlfriend.

I was all set to go buy a PC this morning but phonecall from sister (unbloggables one - see below) and friend and had convinced self I had to get a new mac - which meant buying online. It was a bit of a huuha really, not due to apple store at all but more cause this computer (which is still connected to the dialup and will be cut off by our provider tomorrow morning) takes so damn long to open windows and decided it didn't want to show me the 'add to shopping basket' button. Probably the most important button in the scheme of things. I found the blank space of white screen that was obviously the button though and clicked, clicked a few more times, entered a few numbers, and in a few days time I should have me a powermac. Power baby. Yeah. That means I should be able to access facebook and the likes. A different world really.

The electrician finished the modem installation and then fucked off - showing me the piece of paper that said he wasn't required to do more than that (is free campaign by internet provider) - not that he was actually able to do more than that. In fact he had the cheek to ask if could watch while I set up the wireless antenna - a bit of benkyo (study) he said.

Neither of our current computers able to connect though so as of tomorrow morning sometime I will be off-line, unless I can get them to extend our dial up for a week.

So, my unbloggables sister rang this morning. The first thing she did was appologise for falling off the wagon and not being able to meet me at airport when left Auckland. I said was more fucked off about possible last twenty minutes with mum overshadowed by her and the fuckin bottle. She has 'surrendered' herself to the truth now so hopefully this time round is the real deal. Surely there are only so many times loved ones can put up with it though? I for one do not intend on whole heartedly believing anything she says for the next year or so. Tough love maybe but shite, the past year is record of the lies and deceit. That said I am glad she is back with her family and I do hope it works out.

I spoke to a good friend and my other sister also today. My friend tried to tell me that her family was just as dysfunctional as mine but I beg to differ. Sorry friend, your parents and sister need to come to the party with something more off the rails, but thank you for trying to make me feel better.

I txted and tried to ring mum. She txted back saying all going well and that she was ordering her wig tomorrow.

Woooooooooooooooooooh. That really hit me. For some reason reading this really got me upset - as much as possible when in middle of saying goodbye to English kids and their parents.

She has only been having treatment for three days. Is it even possible for chemo and radio to act that quickly and make her lose hair? Is she just doing it 'in advance' for when it does happen or seriously is she losing it already? Scary. Makes it hit home that is really happening I guess.

My English kids turned up at 4, along with a new girl - whose mother I met at one of Ryu's jab's about two weeks or so before we went home. She mentioned the whole English thing, I obviously said yes, and here we are. Quite good really as unexpected new student will pay half monthly Apple Store payments!!

I'm sure there is more to write but am sleepy as. Ryu been sleeping really well - taking a bit to get to sleep but once he is there he hasn't been waking up till about half five or six, which for me is easily doable if I don't have to wake up during the night.

See you all in about a week I guess.



Lulu said...

Oh god, I am sorry to hear about your sister. That is all you (and your family) need right now. That sucks.

Everyone has dysfunctional familes (and those that don`t are lying)- we all know mine is crazy. Hopefully yours will get less dysfunctional with time.

ANyway- was going to email you but might not get a chance tonight. Soon though! Promise. Oh and you know my email box is always open if you need a rant.

Exciting about the new computer. My current Mac is 2.5 years old and I want a new one- don`t really need a new one. Just want one anyway.

Yay for new unexpected English students.

Oyomesan said...

Tough love with Unbloggable situation is absolutly the best - it is so so hard on the family, because you just get knocked down and then have to get back up and go back from more...but you are right- there ARE limits even for family members.
You have so much on your plate...don't waste the energy in that direction...

Anonymous said...

Good Morning Gaijin Wife

Just wanted to let you know I'll miss you so...HURRY BACK PLEASE.

Margaret M

Gina said...

I'm sorry I am late to comment and read. I just found out now and I am so sorry Katy. I'm sorry your mom is having to deal with this. As you may or not know, my mom also had her own battle with cancer (breast in my mom's case) My wish and hope is for your mom to kick cancer's ass. And for you, I wish to give you a hug. When my own mom went through was devastating to the whole family. You must be absolutely devastated. All the best to you and your whole family. Sending positive vibes to you all and love.

And again, I am sorry I found out so late. I don't know how I haven't read your blog recently. I must have gone retarded or something. I'm so sorry. : (

PS, regarding the wig. Don't know why. But when my mom lost her hair and went shopping, that part really hurt me too. It seemed so real at that point somehow. So serious. So yeah I understand what you wrote about the wig. I get that too.