Saturday, 17 April 2010

Lieing Naked on the Floor

So, I got most of yesterday's list finished - minus the toilets. I mean who really gives a fuck, really. They can stay scody until Golden Week - when I will scrub them golden so help me god. Actually they aren't that bad at all, I just got it into my head that I HAD to clean them before tomorrow.

I got some other shite done yesterday though - cleaned out the fridge. De-grossed it of yuckies so that Granny K wouldn't use anything non-useable over the next two weeks.

Went and had coffee with friend (high tiger boy's mum) - hadn't seen her for ages and she txted and asked if wanted to come for coffee so went - after trip to post office where I got bloody head post office man who doesn't know Ireland from the back of his bloody ass. Sorry European Stylist - mag, baby car signs and SMAP and ARASHI newsletters may well end up in fuckin Iceland.

If they make it through the damn volcanic cloud that is.

All I have to say about that is THANK GOD I'm going to Aotearoa (Maori for NZ - land of the long white cloud) and not Aotea bloody Europe and the land of the long black cloud. That would suck. I mean random volcanic erruption in Iceland stopping all air traffic in and out of Europe - crap. Almost as random as pathologists that commit suicide. And very bad for friend who is 39 weeks pregnant and whose hub is stuck unable to get back from his business trip to France. Fuck!!!!!

But, on to packing. Did that this morning - after hub took the kids to kindy and himself to work. I am allowed the same baggage allowance for Ryu as for self. I had thought one suitcase would be fine.... but then I started packing random omiyage and art and craft supplies and realised I would need to call on Ryu and his baby baggage allowance.

In no particular order (obviously, as money envelopes take up like oh, half a cm...)

These are for my three older neices - 14, 12 and 10. Have no idea what to get them so they will get dosh in cute Japanese envelopes.

For other neices who are Shou and Marina's age. My other omiyage for girlfirends' kids are similar - minus bommer jacket - and perhaps including cute undies and bandaids.

I thought I had a boys omiyage pic uploaded but obviously not. Hmmm, shinkenja puzzles, undies, toothbrushes, bandaids, socks etc. But this pic is where things started getting just a tad out of control. Bloody crafty friend - now has me addicted to buying craft suppies. All I can say is, I hope that if any of my friends suddenly decide to get a mother of small child hobby that it is stamp collecting!!
After packing this morning - and putting suitcases in car to minimize the whole 'mum is leaving' thing tomorrow morning - I went to meet hub for lunch. He was meant to be home in time for us to go to sushi but he fucked up something at the office and had to fix it - hence Ryu and I went to meet him.
The gas light in the car went on so after picking him up went to petrol station - where hub tried to put in 10,000 yen note and it kept getting spat out, so I gave him 4,000 yen. Had a looksie at the 10,000 yen note and thought something is odd here. So odd that I went to bank and withdrew another 10,000 yen. Whadda ya know and the new one has the metallic circle in the bottom left hand corner. The one that got rejected doesn't. I haven't seen a 10,000 like that before so got paranoid.
Police station was two doors down so went there - hub suggested I go in (he is too embarrased - but I would rather police say is all fine as opposed to trying to use 10,000 note at family restaurant and getting rejected) so I do - waving my two different notes around.
And....
After seeing me, a boob weilding gaijin weilding two dollar bills one policeman says to me...
We don't change money.
???
Fuck right off.
Ummm....
I just tried to put this money in at the servo and it got rejected and I was wondering if it was a bit out of sorts...
Ohhh, and then all six policemen proceed to open their own wallets.
Claiming that fuck, all their 10,000 notes have the mettalic thing.
Which of course leads to stares at me thinking am head of foreign counterfitter ring. (??)
Then one lovely scrumpshish young policeman looks up his iPhone and declares that notes printed before 1984 (hello, I was like 8) had nothing by way of metallic marking. Or did he say 1994 or 2004. Perhaps I only heard the 4 but anyway, there are notes circulating.
Upon returning to the car hub asks if I felt stupid asking... ???
And, did I tell them my name.
Um, yeah. I said 'hi, I am Aramaki - the one that lives in the yellowish house with the adventure playground in the front yard - along the road by the river after the eighth tunel in Kunimi, the next town over. '
God man.
And for the record, NO - I didn't feel stupid asking.
We then went to lunch. We saw a girl from Kunimi with her two young boys - she was on her own. Hub commented 'yappa mama ga tsuyoi jyanai to' (mothers have to be strong aye - sorry, strong not very good word. hmmm, capable??) - which me, being menstural and foreign and stressed sounds like 'you aren't' Hellooooooooooooooo, six weeks with two small children by self....
Anway, while we are discussing this Ryu grabs water glass and proceeds to spill all over me, table and chair. Fortunately he missed himself. Me...... I ended up looking like bum had leaked down to back of knee. Awesome. Had another Japanese husbands a twat moment when I asked hub to ring the bell to ask for a cloth - um.... no.
What??
He pulled his man-cloth out of his pocket.
Not going to cut the mustard though, so I go to push the waitress button. Hub caves in and looks very embarrassed when asks waitress for cloth to wipe up water spilt by ten month old son.
Hmmm, another 'event for today' - I was on a mission to get a new plastic bottle for Ryu. The shop in the next town over only had the glass ones so I ventured further a field. Thought would get coffee on way. Just about threw up on dashboard.
I bought the Royal Milk Tea one by mistake. Not nice. I love tea, don't get me wrong. I'm from NZ afterall - wanna cuppa is akin to nice day, isn't it?
I zoned in straight to the coffee section at the store - and without really even looking picked out what I thought was the coffee on the right. Same company. DON'T stick milk tea in between two coffees. Not fair. Sleep deprived, menstrual, gaijinwife isn't quite onto it enough to pick up on it. Humph. What a waste. Got my coffe in the end but.


And this would be popo - lieing cold and naked on the floor. I'm all out of faith.... lah di da di daaaaaaah - Natallie Imbruglie - as if I spelt that right.
Popo-chan - obviously not flavor of the month in the land of devil spawn Shou anymore.
Oh, and guess what....
This time tomorrow I will be on the plane.
Oh, and guess what...
This time next week I'll be out dining with friends.
Oh, and guess what...
This time in two weeks I'll be exactly where I am now :(
SDGH&QL



8 comments:

Sara said...

Bon voyage GW!! Or should I saw Itteirasshai :P

Sounds like you are making good use of your baggage allowance, hoping you have an absolutely no issues flight and that your time home is productive for what its worth.

In 2 weeks you may be back at home again but at least you will have new gaikoku stuff to enjoy.. and hey.. if I can get enough honyaku dosh I might take the opportunity to ask for a GW-style tour of beppu sometime this summer... (if the idea of plate sized spiders doesn't discourage me too much)

Gaijin Wife said...

Sara - re, big spiders. Perhaps you'll be ready for number two by then so frequenting big spider area may be good for fertility. Happy to show round anybody who happens to frequent the land of onsen, big spiders and twat husbands.

Jen B said...

Have a safe trip!

thefukases said...

bon voyage! Here's to Ryu being an angel child on the plane (or at least through take off anyway- I always feel relieved when we leave the tarmac. Much less chance of being kicked off the plane for antisocial toddler behaviour then, right?) and a great trip home.

And popochan? At least she wasn't face down. I have a thing about the dolls lying around naked and face down. Not enough to pack them away properly most days but enough to turn them over.

colorbynumbers said...

Safe trip and hope you get in lots of time with your mum (and no hitches on the plane or anywhere else)..
Hoping you get to enjoy the foooood too...fish and chips?? salivating..

illahee said...

oh man, that popo-chan gets AROUND!! LOL

safe journeys. give your mom an extra hug from your fans.

*giggling at heather*

Bryn said...

Have a safe trip! Hope it's a very uneventful flight, or that Ryu is at least woo the other passengers with his unbearable cuteness, so they forgive him for any nut-outs later!!!!

Make sure you give your mom all the cyber hugs you've been collecting the last few weeks!

Have fun eating lots of yummies and buying lots of goodies!

kuri, ping & the pinglet said...

Here's to a non-eventful trip back home and to getting to see your mom and family!