Friday, 10 April 2009

List Shmist

I got nothing crossed off my list today. Through pure choice I might add :) It was a beautiful spring day. The kids off to kindy, the washing out, the dishes done, the house tidy, the supermarket visited, and time for a cuppa on the deck to admire my tulips and think very vague thoughts about raking the leaves. Thoughts thought and tossed aside and friend comes round for play date.

Can it be a play date if both my kids are out of the house and her older kids are out and she just has the baby - who is content to roll round on the rug? Not much playing going on but a lot of 'my husband the koumuin (civil servent)' talk and 'third time babies'. She seems to be such a calm person so I worry about what I will be like with three kids. Her oldest is two years older than Shou, the second is a few months younger and then the five month old baby. With three under three I wonder if I will not just self destruct - perhaps installing fire alarm on self is advisable!

I did something a bit out of character yesterday. I gave hub the option of going to pachinko for an hour tomorrow while the kids are at kindy!! Why you ask? Silly woman. I got my tax return back on Thursday, and while it was only half what I got last year it was still 30,000 yen (about five hundred dollars). Had I had to fill in the return of my own accord I would have gotten nothing back. Such are the perks of marrying a tax man I guess. Last year I gave hub half of what I got back - seeing as completely his doing that got any back at all. This year I said he could have 10,000 yen and did he want to go to pachinko on saturday - providing he didn't go to one hours away!

He answered in the affirmative - as you would - and is going to the one in the next town over, with his gaijin wife's blessing. Well maybe not blessing, but knowledge at least. He in turn said he would give me half of whatever he won - if anything. That would be silly though. May as well just stick his winnings in the sunvisor bank in his car and tell me he lost!! He is late again tonight - surprise surprise. But it was overtime or coming back for a drinking thing - which he had to turn down.

I had some sad news from a friend this afternoon. She had to have a D&C this morning, which for those who don't know is the operation you have if you have miscarried and your body hasn't 'dispelled' (is that a word?) the 'contents' naturally. I'm not sure if that is what the D and C stand for. My dad told me many moons ago when I had to have the same operation but I have forgotten. I had mine in Japan and it was all together a heinous experience that I wouldn't wish on anyone.

It's hard to find the words at a time like this. When I first miscarried I seemed to be the first in my circle of friends. I didn't know many people who had. You start researching and the statistics are quite high - not that that helps you get through it really. Now, after nearly three (nine weeks to go) normal pregnancies in a row and it seems there are a lot more people I know going through what I went through four and five years ago. I guess more of the people I know are getting hitched now and trying to start families.

Hearing this news makes my heart go out for my friend. Being so far away sucks - especially as she was close to me when I had my D&C and was there to pour me more wine and wipe my tears. Stay strong and rest yourself for a while. I am only a phone call away...

So, after the news there was no way I was going to get the duster and dust the tops of the lights or air cons. I spent an afternoon napping and reflecting on life in the sun. Must enjoy what we have when we can. Not sure if that will stick as my new motto as am such a pessimist but will try. Doesn't help when I walk in on Granny K in the toilet though - very hard to enjoy that one.

Sweet dreams, good health and quiet living.



Midori said...

I am sorry to hear about your friend. I actually remember you posting on MIJ when you had your D&C, my heart really went out to you at the time and I always feel awful for people who have to go through that having already lost their baby. Glad you got some money back through your tax return. Bet your hubby will be even more vigilant with your return next year as he will be hoping for pachinko money! LOL!

Lulu said...

I am so sorry to hear about your friend- miscarriages are terrible and having to go through a D&C as well is so tragic. I hope she is doing okay.

I think it is perfectly fine that you got nothing done off your list- you need to take it easy!