Monday, 4 August 2008

Bigger Blender (Long)

Hub had volunteer firebrigade CPR practice yesterday morning - in full uniform and in 33 degree Kyushu heat. Needless to say he came home looking like he'd been sitting in a sauna for a few hours. Maybe I should borrow his uniform when I do my Core Rythms workout - would no doubt double amount of calories burned.

Granny K wanted to go shopping - to the supermarket in the next town over because they were having specials on eggs and sugar. I said yes, I could take her if she could help me with a child - either or. Take your pick. The baby that's too small to put in the toddler seat of the trolley or the two year old in the trolley who would rather be anywhere but. We got to the supermarket and I asked her to carry Marina while I forced Shou's legs in between the bars on the toddler seat. After handing Marina back to me she then picked up a basket and went about her shopping - asking me to please buy some eggs and sugar - was a special where only could get one per customer. Am oblivious as to why she needs so many eggs and sugar. Perhaps she bootlegs eggnog and invites other vestlings over in the evenings to skull back eggnogg after eggnogg.

So, I was left with Marina in one arm and the other trying to navigate a trolly being wobbled round by Shou. Somehow we managed to make it to the checkout with a small shop of about ten things. Through sheer bad luck, and not being able to steer the trolly properly, I ended up down the lane with the young man on the checkout. Now, I have nothing against young men. Infact I used to like them to no end and in fact still enjoy the odd look but when it comes to checkouts at supermarkets, young men tend to be the least sympethetic to pregnant women and mothers of young children. This aside I still thought he might pack my few items for me - especially as I went out of my way to look like a retard while opening my wallet. God, I just about had to close the zipper on it with my teeth that's how tied up my hands were.

But no. I then had great challange ahead of packing bag because Granny K was obviously off up the other end of the shop comparing the 304 yen piece of eel with the 305 yen peice. We managed to pack the bag and make it outside to the car before Shou started packing a wobbly. Granny K trotted happily out a few minutes later, happy as larry because she had her sugar and eggs.

I realise that mothers around the world have been going to the supermarket with two plus kids since the beginning of supermarkets but I hadn't prepared myself. I would have preferred the supermarket in the town on the other side of Kunimi - that has baby seats where I could put Marina. Then I could do a mixture of holding Shou and having him walk. That supermarket also has prime bribery machines - where you put a hundred yen in, turn the handle and a fantastice plastic digger, snake etc comes out.

Anyway, moving on.

Hub got home and we had cold chineese noddles for lunch. Hub took Shou to release the big stag beetle back to the wild - it had been in beetle box for over a week and Hub was doing the housecleaning of changing the beetle bug dirt and feeding it beetle jellies. Shou had completely lost interest though so only fair that it go back to the wild to find another husband - seeing as kidnapped first husband last week to give to friend's son who is older than Shou and a lot more into them.

The two of them then went crab hunting. They got a few but Shou decided on way home that they had to be put into the river so they arrived home empty handed.

MONDAY

This morning started off with Shou having another meltdown over his favorite T-shirt that had been washed this morning and was on the line. I bought another t-shirt, exactly the same, last week but he wore it to bed last night instead of his PJs and then proceeded to spill half his natto gohan (gag barf beens on rice) down the front. Meltdown lasted for twenty minutes - and I was slowly starting to max out. One of the advert inserts in the mornings paper had rice storage lockers for sale by the local agricultural JA group. I have mentioned many a time that I hate having rice with mice shite and insects in it. What is the point in growing own rice if can't store in place to save it from this?? The lockers were on sale for three hundred dollars - and only cost about 300 yen in electricity a month. It keeps the temperature at about 15 degrees.

Hub and I discussed it and both thought would be good idea to have the smaller one. The best place to put it is in the outroom in the place where there is currently an old freezer - which Granny K told us months ago she didn't use anymore. When she came in to look after Marina while I took Shou to kindy I casually asked her if she had turned the power off to the freezer in the shed. She said no, why would she do that when it was full?? What came after was a jolly good performance on my part. I went from strength to strength

You said you didn't use it anymore
OK then, tell me what's in it?
I bet you can't even reach the stuff in the bottom?
Two big bags of frozen dried raddish??? why??
You have an acceptably sized fridge in your kitchen, what does a seventy year old woman need a commercial sized freezer for? (dejavu)
I have never seen you take anything out of it.

Granny K - silent most of the time but popped in with - tell me how much it costs to run and I'll pay the power for it. I almost said I would rather she saved that money towards her retirement home costs. God, I'm good. I said we were thinking about buying rice storage thingy. She said was top idea. And I said yes, top idea, now can you chuck all the shite in the freezer out so we can move it and put the storage thingy there.

Rah rah, I threw in a few more don't you want your grandchildren to eat nice mice shit free rice? comments, she admitted that she didn't know what was in the bottom half of the freezer, hub laughed a bit, and I ranted some more. Amongst all this yelling in front of our children I did manage to get Shou into a completely different t-shirt and get his kindy stuff sorted. We jumped on the bike and I fumed the whole way to kindy.

And here I was going to start my good-eating and diet plan this week, and now granny K has been a right stupid old cow and I am going to have to spend the next twenty minutes ordering medicial white wine off the internet. Marina and I may well need a night away to escape - or I fear what will happen to Granny K. Her head may well end up in the blender, if it could fit. She so looks like a gremlin sometimes. Bet she would suit a mohawk.

I had calmed down enough that I was almost going to appologise for huge nutout but she was out the door with her silly patchwork handbag as soon as I got home. No doubt she needed to go and vent too.

She left and I core rhythmed and then did step workout and then got on hands and knees to clean floor. Am now having ice coffee and slowly getting blood pressure back to normal by telling whole world about problems. Very very therapeutic. Marina is due to wake up and then it will be some lunch and off to solar panel man's house this arvo to vent to his wife.

In other news - Shou's rash has just about gone. Hub declares is because doctor and pornstar nurse gave us holygrail cream. I reminded him I had only put it on once and hadn't even given him his oral medicine. Hub continues to massage his own feet, drink all his pills, and wear his five toed socks which nurse said he should wear until athletes feet completely healed.

Third load of washing has just beeped. Better hang it out and make use of another thirty three degree plus day.

SDGH&QL

9 comments:

marianne said...

Sending you bottles and bottles of virtual white wine.And a couple of tequila.You so deserve them!

illahee said...

i don't know how you do it. i honestly don't. i would have divorced yoshi long ago if i had to live with his mother. *shudder*

*if* you need some mental health time whenever you're in fukuoka, let me know and i'll be happy to meet up!

gaijin wife said...

kanpai with the virtual white wine. can feel soothing effects already. Illahee - Fukuoka escape sounds fab. could probably find a big blender shop there too!

kasandora said...

you poor, poor woman....I have to visit my mother in law next week (in osaka) and I am terrified...

tj-injapan said...

I can't believe Granny K leaving you for dust like that at the supermarket- is she getting smarter in her old age?? I wouldn't have bought the eggs and sugar for her, just to spite her, lol.

I had enough trouble today trying to keep one kid in the trolley at costcos (and man they are frickin big and heavy trolleys.) You are amazing doing it with 2 kids.

So, when are you gonna make a collection of your granny k stories into a book!?!? I reckon you would have a best-seller on your hands!

gaijin wife said...

Am not quite sure Granny K is ready for big read print. Would feel guilted into giving her some royalties - which I guess she could put towards a home sooner rather than later.

Rachel said...

Don't know how you do it. My health-nut jehovah's witness MIL drives me nuts. It's totally not her fault - I just find her SO annoying.

BTW, how do you rate the Core Rythms DVDs? Was thinking of buying a set myself after being sucked in by the infomercial.

gaijin wife said...

The dvds are quite good. I did the get started one to learn the moves - although should do a few more times. I then did the full on ehours one but didn't last the whole thing. I am now into the quick routine 20 minute one. It is quite catchy although there are a couple of moves I can't quite shake my ass enough too - but only a matter of time. One of the instructors is annoying too but otherwise, it is fearing better than some of the other ones I have gathering dust under the stairs (Billy)

rachel said...

Thanks! Think I'll walk to Tokyu Hands this mroning and look at buying a set then.

Rachel (in Tokyo, very far from the Kyushu health-nut Jehovah's Witness MIL)